Champagne is for celebrating, I'll have a martini.
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You are officially…

42% in Lust!
That’s lustier than the worldwide average of 19% in love!
Compared to others…

2% lustier than you — 0% equal to you — 98% more in love than you
You’re lustier than a hairy old perv in a French maid’s outfit. You don’t care about your crush’s warm personality and interesting thoughts—you don’t even know if your crush has personality or thoughts. For all you know, he/she is a mannequin—or a mute—and you’d give up your first-born spleen for a roll in the hay. Romance is not in your repertoire, Lothario. Beware of donkeys in Cleveland.